Watching Boris Johnson’s cancel christmas speech yesterday evening anchored me more than ever into my deeper ‘why’ and purpose for the work I do in the world.
Regardless of whether I agree with the decisions, regardless of whether I understand the data or the full impact on the NHS and other key workers of allowing people to spend time with their loved ones this Christmas, what I do know for sure is that feminine values and principles are wildly out of balance within our government, and it’s a big problem.
Boris’s delivery of this heartbreaking news felt detached, cold and unemotional. The decisions were presented backed up with facts, data and a seemingly logical approach. I get why, but for me there was so much missing from this address. Most of what was missing are key feminine values…
Where was the empathy for the people who have continued to go to work on the premise that at christmas they would be able to relax and be with their loved ones? Where was the genuine warmth and understanding for the people who have been inside and isolated for many months for whom the idea of being able to be with family at christmas had kept them going? Where was the support, kindness and signposting for those whose mental health will inevitably be rocked by this news?
Let’s for a moment imagine a world in which feminine values were given equal merit…
We actually (and I’m so happy to be able to write this) already have an example in the form of New Zealand and Jacinda Ardern.
Jacinda took much stricter, tougher stances than the UK early on. Her focus wasn’t on flattening the curve, but on total elimination. She closed borders at the stage when there were only a few thousand cases worldwide. I would hazard a guess that these choices were made because of her feminine values: trusting her intuition, a mama-bear style protective nature over the people of NZ and a collaborative call to the people to work together to help stop the spread. Intuition, nurture and collaboration. Things we’ve seen very little of from the UK government.
New Zealand locked down at the point when they had only 102 recorded cases and no deaths. For comparison, the UK locked down at more than 6500 cases and more than 330 deaths. Why did this happen? From my perspective it is, at least in part, because of the unhealthy masculine at play in our government; an over-reliance on science and data, an unhealthy focus on the economy and money over people and a lack of empathy.
The UK government has continuously said that they are making their decisions based on science. This hyper masculine approach of relying purely on data vs NZ’s more balanced data plus intuition approach has been a key failing. It seems to me that Jacinda made intuitive decisions and I can’t help but wonder if this was one of the main reasons for the success of her approach. And of course we can never know, because that is the nature of the feminine; it isn’t able to be backed up and validated by science and logic. But that doesn’t mean it doesnt work or is invaluable, in fact, it seems to be quite the opposite.
I wonder how life in the UK this Christmas would have been different if our government and leaders placed more value and actively practiced the feminine principles of intuition, empathy, collaboration, nurture, and flexibility in collaboration with the masculine ones of science, data and logic.
We have a long way to go. But this is why I do the work I do, helping women to address their own conditioned bias of the feminine within themselves, learning and then sharing how I’m undoing my own internalised patriarchy and reclaiming wealth and power for women and women-created business. We need everyone to rebalance this within themselves, this isn’t just woman’s work, it is work for all humans to restore balance to our planet so that we can all become better leaders and better custodians of the earth we rely upon.
If you’re feeling upset about the news this year, I invite you into a sense of hope, a sense of reclaiming and letting this sad news embolden and strengthen our resolve in bringing balance, peacefully and collaboratively. It is more than time for this change. And it is the feminine in collaboration with the healthy masculine being awakened in all of us which will lead the way.
Let me provide here some of what was missing from the address. I invite you to receive these words and let them support your heart as you move into this very different christmas period…
I understand your sadness, your anger and your brokenness right now. It’s okay to feel your feelings. It’s okay to cry and express and feel it all. Connection with family and loved ones is the most important thing in the world. You are important and you matter. If you are struggling, don’t suffer alone, it is through connection that we heal – you can call the samaritans for free support 24/7 365 days a year – https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/talk-us-phone/